The Path Less Taken – Some Thoughts On #MothersDay

Yesterday was Mother’s Day. It could have easily been just another Sunday for me. A day that includes church, laundry, preparing a weeks worth of school lunches, not to mention filling the fridge with nourishing, healthy, low carb snacks for my family to eat throughout the week, and then squeezing in that run or workout all before having to prepare dinner.

Sunday has almost turned into the most stressful day of the week for me. There is a lot to get done…and a lot of battles to fight. But this Sunday took a different turn. It wasn’t an obvious one, either. It was a hidden path along the side of the road. It called to me even though I had no idea where it would lead me or how far it would go…or even if it would emerge anywhere at all. Where would it go? Would it just be a dead end?

My emotions have been running deep the past few weeks, and I haven’t been coping well with them. I can tell because my sleep has suffered, my running has suffered, my workouts have suffered…as well as my mood. I feel for my family when I get this way. I’m no fun to be around.

The trip to California seems to have triggered it. As much as I enjoyed it and the time spent with my husband, it drained me. I made all the wrong choices and my physical self suffered immensely. It made me very unhappy because I felt like crap. I don’t like feeling like crap. And these days, I only feel that way when I fall off the low carb bandwagon.

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Then, the added weight gain reaked havoc on my running. The leg pain ensued, and suddenly my favorite release was taken from me. Sure, I got a few good Saturday races in, but the remainer of the time I spend a beautiful Minnesota spring inside on the stationary bike trying to come up with a way to burn off these excess pounds.

A visit from my entire immediate family was the only hope I had for a little relief from the blues…and it helped. But sometimes the stress involved in preparing for such a visit can just mask a larger issue. And in this case, I think that is exactly what happened.

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My family left, and I sunk deeper. I tried not to let anyone around here know how I was feeling. Everyone has their own battles.

I was able to get out and do a few walk/runs which helped tremendously. But in the end, the pain would come back, and I would fall back to the ground with a lifeless thump. It was time to take action.

I made the appointment to see my Orthopedist. I didn’t know what to expect. I wasn’t sure what the diagnosis would be. But I thought that perhaps an answer to one of my “whys” might be enough to lift me out of the barracks.

If you keep up with my blog, you already know how that turned out. And you know how my first visit back to my phyiscal therapist turned out, and you know about the goats, and the New Prague Half Marathon. What you don’t know yet is what happened yesterday.

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As I mentioned earlier, it could have been a typical Sunday for me. But instead, I took a different path. Sure, I got done what needed to get done. But I didn’t do what could have gotten done. Instead, I emptied my brain, and let it do nothing. I got out of my head. Much like I did at New Prague. Yeah, I went to church. Then, I got just enough laundry done so everyone had clean clothes for today. I prepared one school lunch. I pulled out a jigsaw puzzle that I bought for myself after Christmas. I wrote my race recap. I went to Yoga. I came home and took a shower. And then we went out for a fine meal. I chose the location. In fact, I even made reservations two weeks ahead of time, because I knew deep down that if I didn’t, we’d end up eating Thai or chinese or burgers. Which isn’t a bad thing…just not what I wanted.

I had my ribeye at a local steakhouse. My daughters found something to choose for dinner despite the limited menu. It was fun! The mood lightened up during the meal, and everyone seemed to enjoy themselves.

When it came time for dessert, I let them have what they wanted. Even my husband ordered an ice cream sundae and seemed insistent I get something…but I wanted nothing.

When the waitress came around with the check, she mentioned that she comped one of the sundae’s because I had a birthday coupon with me. She said, “And you didn’t even order one!” I thanked her and added, “Oh, that’s fine. I don’t eat sugar anyway.”

My husband rolled his eyes and shook his head as if to insinuate that I didn’t need to tell her that. But, I did. I did for me…I did for her…I did for my girls. Somethings are important to say out loud. Some things aren’t. This is important for me.

“Good for you,” the waitress replied, enthusiastically.

Besides, I had my delicious Mother’s Day ribeye. I was more than satisfied.

What else matters?

We got home and I put together that school lunch. I cleaned up everyone’s afternoon dishes. I took out the garbage and recycling. I folded some laundry. All while my husband sat at his computer 10 feet away from me. I didn’t complain. I didn’t roll my eyes. I didn’t shake my head. I just did what I had to do.

Then I opened Mother’s Day cards from my girls. I got a gift certificate to get my nails done. You can be sure I will.

It was a good day. I didn’t allow anything or anyone to bring me down. I held my ground. I emptied my thoughts. I left my emotions behind. And I enjoyed it for what it was, and what is was not. Because sometimes, that is all you can do.

Happy Mother’s Day to all of you moms out there. You are appreciated and loved. Never forget that.

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One Response to The Path Less Taken – Some Thoughts On #MothersDay

  1. Good for you! I enjoy your blog!

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