Lola’s Half Marathon 2017 Race Recap – Part 2

Bling from Lola's Half Marathon 2017

This is Part 2. Part 1 is here!

I remember this stretch of road from last year, but I don’t remember it being so early in the run. This scared me a little because I was thinking, “Damn, I’ve got a long way to go!”

It was here we began to meet up with the 10-milers. They had a 10 minute head start on us, so this seemed like the place to run into them, around miles 5 through 6. This was a larger highway, so there wasn’t much fan support. I remember last year having to put some body glide on my legs as they were really chaffing. I must have done a good job putting it on this year, because so far so good, even though it was 10-15° warmer than 2016.

I was definitely beginning to feel the hurt. Mile 6 was where the relay runners were tag teaming, and seeing those school busses parked in the public boat access lot made it tempting to quit. It was a very steady and debilitating incline from mile 6 to mile 7. I’m pretty certain this is what killed me…right here. It became rather apparent immediately who was a relay runner and who wasn’t just by looking at those around me. The relay runners had fresh legs, and were dry as white wine. It was quite comical, actually, in a morbid kind of way.

When we made the turn left onto the dirt road which would lead us past the winery, I was spent. And it was here when I realized I’d have to take some walk breaks. I knew my husband had a schedule to keep that morning. He was expecting me to finish in 1:45:00, and be heading back home by 9:30 am, but I feared that wasn’t going to happen. I considered at least half a dozen times in the next few miles texting him and suggesting he just come pick me up so we could leave right then and there. Don’t pass go, don’t collect $200 or that really cool medal. But, I had a feeling that if I did, he would just say, “Don’t be silly! Just finish your race. I’m not in that big of a hurry.”

My secret weapon: Bulletproof Unfair Advantage

My secret weapon: Bulletproof Unfair Advantage

Mile 8 and I needed a miracle. I had brought a vial of Bulletproof Unfair Advantage, and I took it. I prayed to Dave Asprey, the Bulletproof founder, and to God, at this point, to just get me to the finish line. I also began to stop at the water stops for plain old water, which I did not have in my hydration belt. It gave me the excuse to stop and walk just a little bit.

Those few moments of walking and the Unfair Advantage may have saved my life. Literally. I still don’t know how I went on.

I was determining at this point that my finish would be over 2 hours, as I spied the 2:00 pacer and the 2:05 pacer. What I didn’t realize at the time was that those pacers were for the 10-milers! So, I had completely overestimated my time around mile 11 or so when I saw them.

It was just after mile 11 that an ambulance passed us by, and I began to worry about those behind me on the course. This was a horrible morning for a run on all accounts, and I said a prayer for those still running and who had miles to go.

I mustered what ever I had left to turn on some steam at mile 12, coming back through downtown and headed up a pretty decent incline. They told me just a few more blocks, and I uttered “Thank the Lord!”

Rounding the final corner at Lola's Half Marathon

I managed a smile for the photographer at the finish line, heard them say my name, crossed with some umph, and spotted the clock which said 1:54 and change. Ahhh! Then it hit me that I started 10 minutes after the 10-milers, and I had passed their pacers.

So, despite how horrid I thought the half marathon had went, I still finished under 2 hours. My worst half marathon time ever, but one for which I am extremely proud despite the conditions.

As I turned to begin the search for my husband, I realized I was stumbling over my own feet. I knew that wasn’t good, so I asked the medic tent for some water. They directed me 30 feet to the left and I thought…”WHAT? YOU DON’T HAVE ANY WATER IN THERE? I MAY NOT MAKE IT 30 FEET, PEOPLE!”

I barely made it to the water table but not without plowing into two bystanders and trying to apologize to them. I don’t think I was speaking words, rather grunting, in the process.

I kept walking…on the sidewalk on the outskirts of the park, making it to the photo wall where I tried to locate my husband. I spotted him 50 feet away but I couldn’t get enough in my lungs to call to him. I texted him, began to stretch out my Achillies and hamstrings, and waited for him to show up. It was the best I could do.

Lola's Half Marathon Finish Photo

Lola’s Half Marathon Finish Photo

He finally arrived and I said “Let’s take these photos and get out of here.” I actually considered editing these photos because I look like hell, then I decided, “No. I look like hell because I feel like hell, and I just ran through hell.”

He asked what happened and I still couldn’t talk. He asked if I ever made it to the bathroom and I shook my head no. He asked if I had to use it now and I shook my head no. In fact, I had forgotten all about the bathroom plight. I imagine my body reabsorbed all the urine just to keep itself hydrated.

Somehow we made it to the Honda, although my husband had to wait for me to catch up to him quite a few times. I knew he was in a hurry to get out of there, but I was doing the best I could. Before I got into the car, I changed out of my sweaty clothes and put on some fresh ones. I found my Bulletproof Coffee which I had thermosed up for after the race and took a sip of that golden wonder drug. Ahhhhh! I was done, and I was headed home. And I had a chauffeur for whom I was extremely grateful.

It wasn’t until we got to Chaska that I was finally able to utter a sound.

Finish Photo from MY photographer!

I was too tired to look up my time, I was too tired to look at my phone. Steve handed me his phone so I could airdrop the photos and video he got of me. Again, I appreciate his efforts. He can be such a good egg.

Upon our arrival home, I said another prayer to God for getting me back to familar territory. My husband departed soon thereafter, and I attempted a nap after a well needed shower. The attempt was futile.

Needless to say, with my husband out of town, I didn’t get my Manhattan, but I did get to partake in a Canadian Club on the rocks at a dear friend’s house while I waited for my girls to finish their pep band commitment. And that was OK. In fact, it was more than enjoyable.

Final Results at Lola's Half Marathon

I have to admit, now that it is finished, I wouldn’t have had it any other way. It was a sobering event for me, but, I needed that. And I needed to learn that above all, I am capable of way more than I give myself credit. I was surprised to learn that I finished 4th in my age group. I guess it wasn’t the best day for anyone. I’m not surprised.

Lola's Half Marathon Bling

Lola’s Half Marathon Bling

AND, I just adore the deep blue of the tech shirt that we got. It is such a unique color. And Lola’s medals always rock.

Half Marathon #24 in the books. Time to look ahead to bigger and much better runs.

Have you ever run a absolutely terrible race, but then looked back on it with respect?


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